Listen To My Latest Podcast Episode:

How to Stop Mimicking Your Mentors - Ep #108

Have you found yourself saying something that doesn't sound like you and you've literally never said before then you have a moment where you realized that you were talking just like your mentor or someone else that you follow?

We all tend to mimic gestures of the people we like and are influenced by the voices of the people around us (it’s a proven sales tactic for professionals!) But it might become problematic if you don’t realize that you’ve lost your own unique voice in exchange for industry jargon and just regurgitated words.

Today we're going to dive into one of the traps that I see happening a lot in the online space—the MARKETING PARROT TRAP. Listen to this episode and give yourself the gift of uniqueness to ensure that when you do show up, it is truly YOU coming out. 


Episode Highlights (full transcript below):

  • What exactly is Marketing PARROT Trap?
  • Why do we continue to mimic and parrot other people? (even if we're aware and we don't want to do it!)
  • Can parroting actually damage your brand? 
  • 3 Actionable steps you can do to make sure you don’t slip into this marketing parrot trap


Mirroring or mimicry or imitation is totally NORMAL!

It's totally ingrained in what we do. We often do this unconsciously because we’re uncertain about the best course of action or because we want to fit in. Alain Samson Ph.D., wrote an article which I found really fascinating called, Copy That, from Psychology Today where he talked about us, consumers. He said:

“As consumers, we may order the same meal that we just saw another person eat, while being unaware of the copying process. Or we may consciously copy others by asking the waiter for the most popular item on the menu. Strategic copying makes particular sense when there’s an abundance of choice, such as for books or movies.”

We usually associate copying with conformity and we want to feel like we belong in this online space so we start mimicking and copying to fit in. But there comes a point where we have to question and ask ourselves, are we operating our business from the direction of where we're going or are we following what we think we should be doing because we're trying to fit in? 


Here’s 3 actionable steps to ensure that you don't slip into the marketing parrot trap

1) Audit your inputs

Take inventory of the things you are consuming—who you're listening and watching to and ensure that you are good with this person, that you like how they communicate, you have alignment with their values and you have respect for how they do business. Be really clear why you're following them.


2) Be cautious with swipes and templates

Don't be cautious or wary of the templates. They're wonderful but they remove the necessity for you to think so be cautious  in terms of how you blindly follow it. 

It's important to be able to question the template to the root of what are you trying to achieve and what's the end goal? Be willing to challenge it, not to totally reconstruct it but to rephrase it.


3) Ask - How would I say this?

As you're going through the swipes and templates and you find something that's not really coming naturally off of your tongue and feels uncomfortable for you, ask yourself, is it uncomfortable because it's new? Or it's uncomfortable because it's not a language you would typically use?

Do not use words or language because some guru online tells you these are the magic words to use or words that you would not normally use because that's the opposite of being authentic with your voice. Keeping the integrity is what the goal of communication is. Remember that your uniqueness of how you communicate things is what's going to allow you to stand out and really connect with your audience.


LISTEN to the AUDIO of this episode:


Grab the full episode transcript below.

Subscribe to Heather’s YouTube Channel here.


Previous Episodes Mentioned:

Meera Kothand: Speaking to an Audience That Doesn't Look Like You - Ep #107

Zafira Rajan: Bringing Personality Through Your Voice (even if you're an introvert) - Ep #106

3 Things Influential Entrepreneurs Do When Talking To Their Audience - Ep #105

How To Articulate Your Thoughts So They Make Sense To Others - Ep #02


Books / Links mentioned in the episode:

The Language of Trust: Selling Ideas in a World of Skeptics, Michael Maslansky

Psychology Today Article


>>> Are you an online entrepreneur wanting to attract dream clients?

Join me inside my FREE TRAINING where I'll teach you how to nail your message when speaking on podcasts, live video and other virtual stages to grow your online business.


Full Transcript

Well, hey, friend, welcome to another month, another episode of the podcast. We are talking today about your voice. It's what we've been talking about for the last few weeks, and today we're going to be talking about one of the traps that I see happens a lot in the online space and maybe this has happened to you where you find yourself saying something that you've literally never said before, but you have a moment of what you're saying you can hear the words of your mentor or someone else that you follow, or maybe, oh my gosh, you have a moment where you realized that you were talking just like your mother. You'll pick up your mother. I don't know. Okay, so sometimes here's what happens. We are influenced by the voices of the people around us and if we are not careful, we will literally copy their words and mannerisms, and it isn't always a good thing.

So today we're talking about something that I call the marketing parrot trap. Note, I'm saying parrot like, Polly wants a cracker, not parent, not to be confused with a wonderful remake of the Lindsay Lohan special from the the 90s. I digress, but the Parrot Trap and that is when you don't realize that you are squawking the words of others and not leaning into your true personality. So today we're going to talk about why parroting, or mimicking, or copying, not in like a plagiarism kind of way, but why that's a normal thing and why that's actually embedded of who we are as humans. But we're going to talk about when you need to be cautious, and most importantly, how do you become more aware of when you're on parrot and how to do things differently. So let's dive in to the good stuff.

All right, the last few weeks, which by the way, if you have missed the last few episodes, I highly encourage you to go back through and binge those because they're all about getting your brand voice down. So back in Episode 105, we talked about the specific things that highly influential entrepreneurs do when it comes to their voice, when it comes to their communication when it comes to showing up to their audience, and when we study what other people do is really easy to say, oh, let's copy what they do.

Today's episode is going to help you not copy but yet find inspiration. But also we had some incredible interviews with Zafira and Meera, where we talked about bringing your personality to your brand and how to connect with people who don't look like you, talk like you, sound like you, maybe they're in a completely different country. How do you tap into being authentic to your brand voice while merging that with the voice and the needs and the language of your audience. I've had a lot of fun talking about voice this month. I hope you have too, but I hope these are giving you really good ideas for how to be more comfortable and confident with showing up and talking to your audience.

So let's really break down and talk about what I feel this marketing parrot effect is and where it shows up. And honestly, what this comes from is, after working with so many entrepreneurs on their webinars, y'all have been there before, right? You've bought a webinar template from someone or you found a swipe type like template or swipe file or whatever, and you have somebody else's script that you're following, and you find yourself saying phrases that you hate. That you're like, Oh, this doesn't sound like me. I'll give you an example of this when you get to a slide on a webinar when you're ready to present the offer and you tell your audience, and now you have two choices.

You might be laughing because I've used this example, many at times on the podcast, but it's the two choices slide that that so many use in webinars and it's driven by this desire to help people make a choice. That's really important in the sales process. However, the language what I find most my clients are just like, oh, it sounds like I'm saying, choice number one, you can continue being an idiot, or choice number two, you can do the right thing and buy from me, which I know obviously, that's not what the actual script says. It just, it feels that way. So maybe you found yourself using scripts, literally, unintentionally being a parrot. I guess not literally being a parrot, but literally using a script to someone else, because you know that it works or supposedly is supposed to work.

That's one of the things we're talking about here is when you borrow someone else's script and you aren't totally comfortable with the language, that's one version of paroting. It's going to be hard for me to remember to keep saying parrot, like a parroting. I felt like a lot of syllables here, anyways. So that's one of the things, right?

So the thing with paroting, we're talking about mimicking, we're talking about using other people's scripts, we're talking about, here's the thing, like, we all know that everyone, not everyone, but it's all starting to look kind of the same online. The Instagram posts, the carousels, I mean for the love of cheese. Everyone and their mom is pulling their graphics from Canva and they have a ton of templates and you see those regurgitates. So things start to look the same. People start saying the same phrasing, you know, right? We've all seen these things, #blessed. What are some of the other really common languages? You know, you could probably think of a couple I'm feeling a little put on the spot right now, but there's just so overly done. The flexible freedom, entrepreneurial beach lifestyle, love the language with that. We're tired of this thing's on repeat.

So the question is, how do you make sure that you're bringing a fresh and unique perspective that's rooted in your own personality and again, language that your audience actually will resonate with? How do we make sure that we're not just regurgitating what other people are saying?

In addition, I think about, so it's mannerisms to its words, its phrases, its mannerisms. I think, have you ever seen this before on Instagram stories, there was a hot minute where people would just say, hey, guys, I'm just popping on to say or I just wanted to pop on for a minute and do this. Another expression I'm seeing a lot that all actually have started using is, let's just hold on, let's just take a beat. Like, we need to pause, we need to take a minute. Where did this take a beat come from? Now it's like very popular. Everyone's saying it.

You might hear, our common love for Amy Porterfield. You hear people now saying, if you're multitasking, come back to me, or bye for now, or even this expression, hey, there. It almost feels like you're stealing them from Amy Porterfield even though she didn't like, obviously invent that phrase, but she always says, hey, there. Similar, I say hey, friend.

We all have our things. Jasmine Star, you do you boo. I tried to say that once. It didn't sound so great because it was not authentic to me. But you see where I'm going here? I'm just giving you a ton of examples where you know people have their go-to phrases and have you ever find yourself saying them you're like, oh my gosh, they're in my head or oh my gosh, I'm turning into a robot, or maybe you don't even notice.

This happen all the time for me when I worked in corporate. Oh, we actually used to make fun of it. How there were some people on our executive team who started saying "literally" a lot and it was very annoying because they were not using it in the right context of what literally actually means, but we make fun of it, and then all of a sudden everybody was saying literally. I don't know all the sudden we were saying literally not because we wanted to but it was just one of those things that it kept coming out of our mouth. It was like contagious.

Words and mannerisms have a tendency to do that even if we're like, oh, we're not gonna do that. We do. It's just how it works. It's like how trends catch on fire in real life and on the online space. It just happens that way. And it's like, why? Why do we continue to do this? Why do we continue to mimic, and parrot, and copy other people even if we're aware and we don't want to do it?

Well, it comes down to this idea that mirroring, like a mirror, or mimicry or imitation, it's normal and it's totally ingrained in what we do. I got a little studious here preparing for this episode and I was reading a couple articles on psychology today.Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I've read in that, baby. I want to understand how human behavior works and how just the psychology of how we communicate with one another interact with each other. It's fascinating.

There was an article, I'm going to link to it in the show notes. But the article was, I actually going to pull it up here because I'm going to give them a shout out. So PhD. Alain Samson, he wrote this article called, Copy That, and it was fascinating. He was talking about us consumers, I'm gonna quote here. "As consumers, we may order the same meal that we just saw another person eat while being unaware of the copying process or we may consciously copy others by asking the waiter for the most popular item on the menu. Strategic copying makes particular sense when there's abundance of choice, such as books or movies."

He talks about how like, we literally look for what other people do to copy it, like, how funny is that this is totally out of context in this example, but I just thought this was fascinating to me. He goes on to explain that this idea that when it comes to doing this, whether it's conscious or not, we often associate copying with conformity. Yeah, there's also this idea around, it brings in togetherness and we want to feel a part of something, so we look to others so that we don't stand out. But how do we balance this desire to fit in whilst knowing that online as a marketer, we have to stand out? It's kind of funny, right? When you think about this dichotomy between this desire to fit in, right, and let me hit on this for a second.

If you're in the online space, especially if you're newer in business, maybe you're like me, where you came from a corporate job and you built a successful track record and now here you are treading water in this whole new space where you're trying to figure out podcasts and email lists and am I supposed to go live? And how do I, how do I create? Should I do an evergreen funnel, or a live funnel, or a challenge launch? These are all these things, right? And part of you never done these things before, it doesn't matter how experienced you are, they're all new and you want to feel like you belong. You want to feel like I know what I'm doing, some kind of semblance that, oh, man, I'm a master of this, I'm a pro at this, we want to be successful. And part of that success oftentimes is saying, we want to feel like we belong in this online space, so what do we do? We start mimicking and copying, whether it's language or strategies or whatever else. We start doing those things to fit it. But there comes a point where we have to start asking ourselves some questions and saying, are we venturing into our businesses? Are we operating in our businesses from a mindset of we're leading the ship. We're steering the ship. We are directing the direction of where we're going or are we following what we think we should be doing because we're trying to fit in?

I don't know the right answer that for you. But I think that's a question we have to ask ourselves is, remember, you have a business, you need to think about how you want to operate your business. Taking who you work with, how you can best serve them, but also taking your experience and knowledge and uniqueness. You have to pull those things together and you have to decide how you're going to show up and what strategies you're going to use. We can't just, here's the thing, even if you were to take the best practices of the top performing businesses in the online space, if you were just to take those systems and processes and implement in your business, I'm sorry, yeah, it's gonna, here's the thing. Systems and processes are great but without the, I'm gonna break all the rules here, without the magic of understanding how they work and fully showing up and really connecting with your audience. I'm sorry, but systems and processes can only get you so far. You got to be able to use your brain to understand the strategy so you can adapt when necessary.

So I'm going off in a little bit of tangent here, but I want you to hear me that when it comes to mimicry, and fitting in, and imitation and kind of fitting in, right? I'm trying to be like with the cool kids. That's a funny expression that I use a lot/we're all kind of sick of like, that's even an example here of an expression that just has kind of caught fire and it's easy to identify with, right? Which is very, very meta in this example but I want you to remember that we got to think.

We got to think and take ownership for the words that we use, for how we show up, the strategies that we apply. That's really what this comes down to. So mimicry, if you find yourself saying phrases or using scripts of other people, it's totally normal. Many, many people do it. Hell, I've done it. I bought swipes and templates and all those things, right. But what I want to do is, imagine this. Imagine you go shopping and you have a budget to buy some clothes and you buy these, like, let's say you buy an outfit. That's like beautiful, it's wonderful and it fits, right? The pants are long enough but we all know there's a difference between buying something off the rack versus having it tailored for you. And I don't know, I don't think I've actually ever had any of my normal clothes tailored, so let's not go with that because I have had gowns tailored.

So if you're a dude that doesn't wear, has never worn a gown. Just imagine with me for a moment on this example. But if you're listening, you all know, you've either been to a wedding, seeing a bride or been a bride, or you've had an important dress that you've worn that you've had altered before. And if not, you can imagine this, right? But most dresses, they're beautiful off the rack, but just where they hug and where they don't know where they come in, you got to customize it a little bit. Swipe some templates, using language, the things we talked about on the show, the same holds true for this.

You have to know that the structure of it, it can be wonderful, right? That the script that somebody gives, you can be awesome, but it doesn't mean that it's awesome for you. You have to take it that extra 10th of a mile, that extra five miles, whatever it looks like depends on what you're building and what you're starting from. You have to be comfortable shaking off the script, or I don't know, just borrowing other people's language, you have to make it your own.

I cannot express this enough. This is exactly how I help people fix their webinars is when they have language like I mentioned before around the two choices slide or they have some of the bogus like engagement questions that, you know what I'm talking about, is you cringe or my favorite expression that many of you told that you laugh every time I say on the show, you clench your butt cheeks a little bit when you say the phrase, and you're like, I hate it, but I'm supposed to use it because it works.

Ah, you did not have to say it. I'm going to teach you a couple things here today. I'm going to give you a couple things to consider. Grab a notebook. Make sure you take a screenshot. Share this episode, if you want to join the band of entrepreneurs who are breaking the mold and saying screw the scripts. We are writing our own damn script. That's what we're here for. Make sure you share this episode with your peeps on Instagram or whatever platform you know you love. I'm just hanging out there the most. But let's talk about how you break that mold without compromising the strategy behind it. Hear what I just said. How do you break the mold, right, without compromising the strategy behind it? That's what this customization around finding your own voice is really about.

The question is how do you not slip into this marketing parrot trap. I'm gonna give you three things. Number one, number two, number three. Number one, audit your inputs. Number two, be cautious with swipes and templates. And number three, ask, how the hell would I say this? Those are the three things. Let's dive in.

So number one, audit your inputs. I know this is gonna feel like a little bit of a basic thing here but I feel like every once in a while we need to like shake the cobwebs out of our brain to remind ourselves some pretty simple principles. My favorite Will Rogers’ quote is," just because it's common sense, doesn't mean it's common practice." So here we go with a little common sense coming at you first of August.

Audit your inputs. I mean, take inventory on who you are listening to for your business advice. Which podcasts are you listening to? Which Instagram Stories are you watching most? Which videos on YouTube are you taking in? What books are using? Well what I say, most of this is auditory and visual right? But what I want you thinking which courses are you in? Who are you attending live Q&A is for? Any of those kinds of things, take inventory of who you're listening to and ensure that you are good with this person, that you like how they communicate, you like how they do their business, you have respect for how they do business, you have alignment with their values.

One of the things that I want to consider is, if you only follow one main mentor, this is a good thing. I think it's good to kind of narrow your scope down. But what I want you to be careful of is if you only follow one main mentor, you really put yourself in a position to fall into this parroting trap heavily because you don't have any outside perspective to shake up a different way to say it, and if you don't have examples from other people, you might struggle taking something that they do and figuring out how to make it your own, because the only example you have is in them So just keep that in mind.

But I want you to audit your inputs. Now when you follow people online be really clear why you're following certain people. Are you following them for entertainment? Are you following them for perspective? Are you following them to model business advice? So I have quite a few mentors that I follow online, but I only really listen to a few when it comes to me getting ideas for putting strategy in my business. If I listened to, I don't know more than four or five people, I would go crazy, because then it would be constantly going, should I do this kind of launch? Or should I do this? Or should I do this? Should I do that. And if you're struggling with that right now, sidenote, maybe narrow down the list of people that you're putting in your ears. It doesn't mean that you have to stop listening to them but maybe it's more of a listen just for entertainment but before applying anything they mentioned or before you start chasing down any rabbit holes, make sure that you're really doing a gut check that it's something that you want to do, so audit your inputs. Make sure that the voices that you're listening to, they align with you and make sure you have people in your ears that have personalities that you jive with, right, and get inspiration for how people show up and communicate. So make sure that you're following people, listening to people that inspire you. You like how they communicate, not just what they communicate.

Okay, number two, I want you to be cautious with swipes and templates. This, this, this is a big one, my friend. I mean, you most likely have a ton of these, right? Whether you've bought one of the bajillion $37 toolkits off of a Facebook ad or you've downloaded swipe files from your trusted mentor, maybe you've purchased templates for a webinar or for something else, right? What happens is you get this framework for another person. I want you to be cautious and hear me very loudly when I say this. Don't be cautious or weary of the templates. Be cautious in terms of how you blindly follow it. Well, I'm just gonna say it. This is where my Speak up to Level up students. We have a, they have a little bit of a love hate relationship with this idea because inside of Speak up to Level up, I always tell them, I'm not going to give you a script for exactly how to do all the things. I'm going to give you a framework. I'm going to give you templates. I'm going to teach you how to approach these things nd sure, I'll give you some scripts. But if you want to become a more influential communicator and really nail it on any stage you get on not just the one, the one talk you created, you have to learn how to communicate.

So here's the thing when it comes to swipes and templates, they're wonderful But they remove the necessity for you to think. I don't want you to turn off your brain and want you to turn it on. So as you're going through swipes or templates, I want you to ask yourself the question around, oh, what are we trying to do here with this part? Let's say the swipe for an Instagram post. Okay, so instead of just blindly filling the blanks, I want you to read it and go, what are we trying to accomplish here? So that way, as you're filling in the blanks, if it's not really coming naturally, you can go, you know, I actually wouldn't phrase it like this. I would say it this way. That's what's really, really important is I want you to be able to question the template to the root of what are we trying to get here? What's the end goal?

So for example, let's talk webinars since that's something that people talk to me or asked me a lot about. When it comes to a webinar, if you are feeling really stuck with a transition point, maybe moving from the teaching into the selling, feels really like rough for you and you hate the suggested scripting that somebody provided for you. Well read the scripting and go, what's the goal of this phrase or what are we trying to do here? I want you to understand that, right? Be willing to challenge it, not to totally reconstruct it, but to be willing to rephrase it which brings me to I think the most important thing, which is number three, ask, how would I say this?

So the thing I want you to think about here, let's say that you get a template, right? And maybe this swipe is somebody says, I don't know, maybe the webinar where it's like, okay, so right now, you're probably wondering, okay, so what do I do from here? Well, the way I see it is you have two choices. Let's say that was the script and you're looking at going, oh, my gosh, if I read it, I'm going to read it and going, and the way I see it is you have two choices. I can't even fix my face what I'm saying that because it's so sarcastic. It just is not language that I would ever say and for many of you, it might sound totally natural. But for some of you, you're going, that I would never say that either.

So if you're going, huh, red alert! My butt cheeks are clenched. This feels uncomfortable. Ask yourself the question, is it uncomfortable because it's new or it's uncomfortable, because it's not language you would typically use? And if it's the former, practice it until it is comfortable. If it's the latter, it means do not use language that you would not normally use because that's the opposite of being an authentic with your voice. Do you hear me? Do not use words or language because some guru online tells you these are the magic words to use to make the sale. And that example in my head, that person was a dude with a moustache and some kind of accent that I don't quite know what that was but hopefully that was comical for you.

So I want you to go, alright, if this feels uncomfortable coming off of my tongue, how would I rephrase it? Okay, so if the point here is going huh, Alright, so we're winding out the end to bring the point to go what's next and I'm trying to set up the fact that they can either continue to do what they're doing now to get kind of the same results or they can follow a process. That's like the point of that slide, right?

So okay, so how would I say it? This is where you word vomit, and practice which side note, go back to episode, I think it's like the first episode ever on this podcast, like most downloaded episode, how do you articulate your thoughts so other people can understand you? I think it's episode number one or two. Go all the way back and listen to it if you haven't in a while. I teach you an activity that is the number one activity in Speak up to Level up, which is the word vomit activity, so go back and listen to that one. How do you articulate yourself? So we're going to word vomit a bit right here. So this means it's not perfect, but I'm just gonna get some things out.

So if I were to go, okay, as we're wrapping it up, I would wrap it up and be like, okay, so as we pull this together, and we've already, like, honored what they've learned in the webinar. I could say something like, alright, so as we see how all these things come together, can you imagine how this is really going to make a difference in your business, right? And you're probably wondering, okay, so how do I put this into practice? So you have a couple options here. Number one, you learned a lot of great things today that you can run with. There's option one, right? And then I would say something like this, this is typically what I say my webinars. But the chances are, if you're any like B and you've attended other free trainings in the past, you most likely feel really good taking notes but in practicality get back to your office and you still have a lot of other things to do when that momentum wears off a bit. I get it. I do it all the time. So the question is, if you're sitting here and you're excited, do you want to go the path where you know that momentum is going to fizzle or would you rather make this a priority in your life and business right now and get yourself some accountability, taking action with a proven process to help you do just that?

I don't know. I just made that up right here as a moment, but you hear how that sounds? Do you hear how all of that's true? Authentic. It is just my words come in through, obviously. I've done a lot of webinars. But what I want to point out to you today is you have to try different language and say, how would I say it? If I was just being fully honest and transparent and compassionate, how would I say it? Keeping the integrity of what the goal of that communication is? Are you following me? I want you to be a little bolder, a little bit more brave, challenging the standards of this industry, challenging the the way that we're supposed to do things. You're an entrepreneur, you are total trailblazer. You do not have to follow anybody else's path. I don't know why I needed to like put up about that.

But what I want you to think about is literally we all sell this concept of having roadmaps and pathways and I literally teach you how to do this and that's true literally here but how to do that, how to create pathways to make it easier for people. But we also have to understand when do we follow a path blindly and just become lemmings. Remember that game, that video game. I just played on my like old school computer, oh my gosh, lemmings. I love that. Anyways, but we don't want to have like the fun kind of lemmings, but just the following and just going on autopilot following somebody else's path without putting our own brains on it. It happens in our businesses, but it also happens with our voice.

And let me remind you, friend, that your voice is your unique footprint in this space. It's your unique fingerprint, whatever you want to call it. It's the thing that makes you most you. Your ability to show compassion, and empathy, and excitement, and enthusiasm and confidence. It comes out through your voice. So do not take your foot off the gas pedal and allow somebody else to drive. I guess we're going with a car analogy here. The car that is you, right? You need to own your voice and definitely I hope this in the show helps you come up with ideas of ways to structure, your voice structure ideas, come up with stories. We talk about these things all day long on this show, but I hope you remember that you have such unique gifts, and experiences and perspective and you are freakin smart and you have done incredible things.

And I know, I don't, I might not know you exactly as you're listening here and maybe the only time that we've ever met is on this podcast when you show up every week. But I trust that if you're here and if you're the kind of person who is doing the work to continue to get better in life and business, I know, you haven't just been sitting on a couch and Netflix and chilling for the last 10 years. You've done some stuff. I want you to trust that and trust that if you allow yourself to think critically and aligned that with strategy, oh my gosh, friend, you unlock a whole next level for you.

So round it out, I want you to remember that creating community is a good thing, that togetherness where we all kind of feel like we're on the same page because we share interests and maybe we say same phrasings or we talk about things in a similar way. But remember, you also have that uniqueness of how you communicate things and that's what's going to allow you to stand out and really connect with your audience. You know, I'm going to end with this.

One of the things that I found when I was working in corporate for years, right? I've told you this before. I was an executive in the corporate space, but specifically working with entrepreneurs for a decade. I had the chance to sit at a lot of fancy pants executive corporate tables. I sound like, I roll my eyes when I say that. But here's the point that I want to make.

It was people who worked on laptops all all around the world that had big fancy jobs and when I was sitting boardroom meetings with them and listen to the jargon that would come out of their mouths. I was just in my head. I was laughing so hard because I thought why do we need to talk this way? Can we just talk like normal people and use normal language? I had heard and experience for years, talk to your customers in like third grade reading level, that's how you're gonna connect. But I was struggling to understand why was it that these high level C suite executives and vice presidents around the world, why did they feel the need to continue to talk at such a over complicated and whatever level. It just, it was just annoying to me and so I didn't.

I chose not to communicate that way. I had a little bit of moment where I'm like, man, I don't want to sound, I was the youngest person in the room like I don't want to sound young and dumb. But also, I know when you speak in a more plain spoken way, it breeds trust. Side note read the Language of Trust with Michael Maslansky. I think I hit on that a couple of months ago on the podcast. Excellent, excellent read, by the way. But Michael Maslansky, he talks about the five P's in building trust, especially in this highly skeptical, consumer world, but be plain spoken.

So here I was about a 20-something young, 30-something in these boardrooms, just talking like a normal person using normal language because that is what was in integrity with me. That was the language that I wanted to use. And let me tell you, that's how I paved my path. I would have people come out of the meetings and go, I just love the fact that you call it like it is. It's just easy to follow you when you're going down, like when you're explaining things. I started getting that feedback from my workshops and presentations and that's what helped me kind of catapult speaking all over the world was this idea that I ditched the need to sound smart and sound like I deserve to be in that room, and I leaned in to just talk in plain spoken language that was authentic to me because I knew at the end of the day, that's what's going to help me connect.

And that's my hope for you as you walk out of this episode today is go, can you sense those moments where you're using language or doing things in your business where you're doing them from an ego perspective, or you're just trying to keep up with what other people are doing or what you think you should be doing? And if you listen to the show, you know how I feel about the word should. Screw it all baby and ask yourself, is this in alignment with how I show up? Is this how I would say it? And if it's not, give yourself the gift of taking a different action. Change the words, change the way you show up. Make some changes until it feels in alignment with you. It doesn't mean it's gonna be comfortable but remember, if we're doing big things, if we're leveling up, if we're growing, of course, it is going to be uncomfortable, but at least we're going to be uncomfortable being our truest selves. That's another phrase, I totally hate, our truest self but I think it totally works here. So you know what we're going to be cheeseball as we're going to go with it, so here we go.

Alright, friend, I hope that your little lightning bolts in your brain are just firing off with lots of ideas. But most importantly, I hope you take at least one or two things. Let's boil it down around what you're going to do coming out of this episode. So number one, I want you to be aware of the information you're taking in. So again, audit your inputs. Be mindfully aware of what you are putting into your brain or your influence. Number two, I want you to be cautious with swipes and templates. I'm not saying don't use them. I use them all time my business, but I want you to be cautious with them and not blindly follow them because number three, you're gonna get really good at asking yourself, how the heck would I say this? What's the Heather way of doing this? What's the Serena way of doing this? What's the Melissa way of doing this? Whatever you, like wherever you are, when you listen to this, I want you to

All right, friend. I hope you enjoyed this episode. And hey, I'd love to hear from you. Send me a message on Instagram and tell me what was the one thing that one made you laugh today or the thing that really, really made you think? I'll see you on the next episode.


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